UNC Doc Dump Mad Libs

As you may have heard, UNC released a bunch of documents (pdf) Wednesday pertaining to the NCAA investigation into its football program, and a quick scan made clear that countless gallons of whiteout were used to redact significant portions of text. This presents an opportunity to fill in some blanks and create our own stories from this pungent stack of nothing, over which there is now a massive hole in the ozone layer.

Anyway, here is what I need for this particular exercise:

1. Number

2. Number

3. Location (laundromat, movie theater, etc., not a city/state/country)

4. Number

5. Number

6. Something you'd give as a gift (plural)

7. Number

8. Man's name (first and last)

9. Brief story about how two people met for the first time.

10. Another gift (singular)

11. Another man's name (first and last)

12. A situation requiring help (monetary or otherwise) from a friend.

Now I need you guys to provide the material. In an effort to involve as many people as possible, I'll only take one submission per person, though you can pick which of these you want to contribute. (Crossed out lines have been accounted for.)

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