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What To Do With Lonnie Poole's Money?

As you might have heard, Lonnie Poole donated $40 million dollars to NC State last week, with all but $3 million going to the College of Management.  The College of Management has always been a front for the Wolfpack Club, of course.  The truth is in the vagueness.  If you've ever been inside Nelson Hall, you know there isn't any learning going on in there, unless you count the times Bobby Purcell takes some high-level donor to school on the sealskin billiard table.

When you reach a certain level of extravagance, it's hard to find worthwhile avenues of in-your-face excess.  Sure, we could build an indoor practice facility for the football team. But that's boring.  Besides, O'Brien had his chance.  He doesn't need a fully-staffed bar in his office, or an endless supply of solid gold America hats, or a Harrier jet for errands about town, he says.  He just wants peace enough to make some calls to the nation's top long snappers.  The man is a party pooper.

We could fully fund the club money fight team, which is a long time coming.


And there is no question that the bass fishing team has proven worthy of an upgrade.



Opposing craft would be no match for the Get Them Fishes, especially at ramming speed.

No, what we need is something that serves no practical purpose whatsoever.  The Murphy Center has been screaming for a good bedazzling.


Further, and admittedly this would take several decades of careful investing, we could move forward with an operation truly epic in scope.