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My Other Car Is Four Other Cars

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As you are probably aware by now, UNC released a bunch of new information to the media today related to the investigation into its football program. Among other things, the documents show that UNC football players racked up over $13,000 in parking tickets between March 2007 and August 2010.

My favorite part so far, though, is this report from the Daily Tar Heel:

It appears that one UNC football player accrued 93 parking tickets under nine license plate numbers between October 2007 and August 2009, according to parking records UNC released today and a database search of the University’s Department of Public Safety website.

[snip]

The plates in question corresponded to cars including a gray Dodge, a gray Nissan, a black Acura, a black Honda and a green BMW, according to the records.

Not a big scooter guy for on-campus transportation, huh. Forget about the potential for wrongdoing here for a second because this is a kid who appears to require an intervention. Must be an impulse car-buyer. One day he probably ended up driving down one of those roads with like three dealerships in a row and was compelled to stop at each one. It happens to the best of us.