Dave Doeren Opts Against 'We Are Going To Die' Opening Statement To Press Conference

Dave Doeren spoke to the media about the terror that awaits his team this weekend, and he said the things that needed to be said, boldly choosing not to guarantee a victory in Tallahassee.

One could call NC State a "trap game" for FSU.

"That's be great, wouldn't it?" NC State head coach Dave Doeren joked. However, Doeren knows better.

"If they don't play well, that'd be great, but I'm anticipating a great Florida State team," he said. "That's what we've seen from every game on tape: them dominating people."

Yeah, they're pretty good. Personally, I prefer my football teams to smell faintly of pork and symbolize the futility of human existence, but to each his own.

I enjoyed the bit about NC State Fair attendees being incredibly confused by all of the loud noise coming from the Wolfpack practice field. It won't cost you any money or tickets to get into practice, but you had best be prepared for the jamboree contained within. Don't forget to play the Guess Your Distance From The Line Of Scrimmage game with Pete Thomas, because you always win.

"A bunch of people from the state fair were coming over looking through the fence trying to figure out what we were doing," Doeren joked.

"Hey, dad, which ride is this?"

"You do not want to know, son. Have you seen what out-of-state colleges have to offer?"