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'The Return' Still Haunts Poor UNC

Melina Vastola-USA TODAY Sports

The title of an article caught my eye on Tuesday: "Memories of ‘The Return' linger for Heels, Wolfpack." I didn't need to read beyond that point because I knew exactly where the story was going. In State's case, lingering makes sense; in Carolina's case, frankly, it's starting to get pathetic.

Buck up over there. You've got a lot of positives going for you, North Carolina. Football is not one of them. More specifically, covering punt returns is not one of them. But you know what, who cares? No one likes punts or punters. Punts are basically an intermission for commercials nowadays. Not only should you watch punts with contempt, you should generally disregard their results.

Don't develop a punting problem. Punts are not football. I find that it's best simply to turn the channel whenever it appears that a punt may be in the near future. There is virtually no cost to this--either you miss some guy you never heard of kick a ball out of bounds or, in the rarest of instances, there is a disaster. At least that's what I've heard. The above video shows the only punt I've ever witnessed live; I have incredibly good luck.